Thursday, February 20, 2014

I am not Beautiful YET!

Like success, Beautiful is a word that lies in the hand of the beholder or 'beholdee' (totally made that up). The dictionary cannot simply dictate what it is. In this case it is honestly, "To each their own".

I will of course talk about my definition of the vague word Beautiful but before I do, allow me to say that to me, this is in no way a synonym to pretty, hot, sexy, smashing and ( Insert word).  You're probably thinking (or not but i'll tell you anyways ;) ) how I came up with this. A friend tagged me on a post that said "Tag someone you think is beautiful" while it warmed my heart, I replied saying "funny thing is I do not think I am beautiful".

What do I not consider beautiful?

Hair extensions, make up , surgery, clothes and jewelry do not render one beautiful. They are what we use to enhance what we have or don't have. For lack of words, they are the icing on the cake. All cakes are iced/frosted to make them look appealing to the customer. And again for lack of words, I call them vanity.
I am in no way bashing these, as I turn to them on the daily. One of my aunts always says, in this day and time, there is no reason for any woman to look some type of way LOL.  Even with all these I do not look at my reflection and see beautiful; pretty, the BAM look yes, beautiful NO. Then again I said the answer lies in the hands of the beholder or 'beholdee'. This is only how I see.

What I consider beautiful?

I've already established that it is not the outer appearance that makes one beautiful but the inner beauty, their soul. I do not have words to adequately explain what I feel beautiful is but let me explain a situation that will maybe make it clearer.
Say you were at a party, someone walked in, you didn't look at them and do double take ;) but then they ended up sitting next to you and you engage into a conversation about something deep and they voice their  honest opinion. You will begin to look at this person differently and you gave him a 6 when he walked in, I guarantee you he is walking out of there a 7 or at least a 6.5 ha!. Whatever the case you have a better impression. If this 'acquaintanceship' continues and you get to know the person and see them for who they are, then you call them beautiful. We could say it is somewhat based on character and mannerisms. I have met gorgeous young ladies who no one wants to be around simply because of who they actually are. What they showcase has not altered their beauty in anyway, but it has pushed people away. People do not look at them and see a gorgeous lady, they see ugly no matter what.

I hope you get a better picture of what I think beautiful is.

Who do I consider beautiful?

For us to be on the same page, I will use celebrities. Why not start with the already trending, Lupita Nyongo. I do not know this woman personally. When I first watched 12 years a slave, I said good movie, good actress and thought nothing more of Lupita. Then as a result of her many awards, I listened to her talk about who she is and issues of concern to her. I no longer viewed her as a good actress but a good person and then when people will focus on her outfits, her comment, I forget the exact words blew me away. She is forever slaying that red carpet though. However, her response spoke to me and I saw her as Beautiful. When I look at her now, I'm thinking I wanna be like her....For me to say that, means she has met her goal, to inspire others. I guess I could add that the effect you have on others, makes you shine brighter than ever.  Some other women will be Michelle Obama, Oprah and many more. I think those names speak for themselves. By those names I am in no means attributing power to being beautiful. These two women just happen to have both.

Why do I not consider myself beautiful?

I know no one can be perfect. The most we can do is strive to be. The answer to this question to me is I do not know! I don't know why! All I do know is my reflection does not scream that to me. I guess I'll know the day it does. And no lol, I do not have a low self-esteem. My self-esteem is where it needs to be at and probably a little higher but I still feel this way. Maybe once I do things that give me inner joy, inspire my generation and put smiles on faces, I too will shine brighter and be able to see it.

Your thoughts and concerns will be very much appreciated.


11 comments on "I am not Beautiful YET!"
  1. I was a little skeptical with where this was going but was happy at the end. I can totally relate to your message and I myself do not feel beautiful at all. I don't know if "feel" is the right word for it but maybe you might indeed "feel" beautiful. When people tell me i'm beautiful, I look at them and give a fake smile back and say thanks for the sake of formalities because I Know deep inside, I do not feel that way.

    1. One day it will all unfold :)! I always knew we were great friends for a reason ;) Until then we go with the flow and do the 'Awww thank you' lol.

  2. "Beholdee" huh? I love that....and the article as a whole. Strictly looking at the article, we'd say beauty is relative - it depends on how others look at it, and the opinions may vary. But I believe the message you're trying to pass across is that beauty is the hidden light in you which you radiate to others through your deeds and words. And sweetheart, that makes the article itself very beautiful. Thank you for giving my idle mind something to ponder on

  3. I need to oxford dictionaries up so they can upgrade! LOL...And yes that is exactly my message. Thank you and I'm happy to oblige ;) As always I appreciate your comments :)

  4. Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder, true ,but we also feel very beautiful when we realize what our sole purpose in this world is. Many of us live and go with the flow and sometimes (like in my case) don't really do what we feel is right because we don't want to look different from the crowd and not fit in. When you unlock your potential, and become the person God intended for you to be, living a fulfilled life (not necessarily materialistic), and treating others the way we want to be treated (which can be hard i know) then do we begin to really feel good about ourselves and beautiful. It is a step process. Good luck.

    1. Hey Anom, exactly my point. It is a step process, to me, life's process and goal. Thank you for taking the time to read and for sharing :)

  5. Impressive article, and an interesting perspective on beauty. I agree with you, 'tis one of those things the mirror won't tell you. Anyway OYAH! you say you don't think you're beautiful abi lol, NOTED! ;-) And like always nice one. Cheers!

  6. I'm glad you keep doing your thing ! Nice article ;)
    (Somebody who'll never forget you because youre a nice person!)


I appreciate your comments :)

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